in the summer last year i was eating a very run of the mill packet of walkers, the flavour is irrelevant, and they were advertising for a new campaign were we, the british public could design our own flavours and packaging with the winning few being made and sold on the high streets, in the vending machines and on the hospital wards across the country.

now, the flavours are a vast array of thoughts i had at the time, and i do wish i’d have entered, my flavours would be a damn sight more logical, reasonable and pallete-able anyway. for instance, fish and chips, staple english friday evening food. in a crisp im sure it would be horrid, but an impulse buy horridness non the less. who would buy something like this in the form of a crisp? i can only imagine it tasting like fragrant sick on your tongue.

another one, which i must admit i did think about is onion bhaji - again, an english classic. kind of.  however, one which i don’t get, at all, is cajun squirrel. surely, this must be similar to rat? squirrels, in my mind, are cuter rats that run quickly up trees instead of along the drains. who in their right mind, would want to peck on a few boney, disease ridden, hairy incumbants of viral plauge. also, you’ve got the issue with smell. imagine you’re sat on a train eating a packet of prawn cocktail. they stink. id go as close as saying they have one of the most putrid smells in existance when confined to a small place. and really, all they are, or all they’re supposed to be at least is prawn. now, cajun squirrel on the other hand. a tree rat with earthy cajun tones, must be like sniffing the inside of a park bin.

walkers claim that “no squirrels were hurt in the process of making these crisps.”  two things grab me here. firstly, how on earth did they get the “flavour” of them. and secondly, why not? i cannot imagine for the life of me any singular squirrel offering him or her self up for “tasting sessions”. i can easily and quite happily imagine three or four squirrels suffocating in a bird box, they dont strike me as the most shrewd of animals.

anyway, i do hope the squirrel one doesn’t win.  people should just stick to normal flavours that don’t hurt anyone. like beetroot and chocolate.

horrible words have been used by the global media in regards to what the snow has done, one company said that we’d been paralysed. some pitted the words ‘freak, weak and incredibly bleak’ towards us, and others simply said we were hit when we least expected it.

but it was only snow. rain, thats a little bit harder and colder. it makes the floors, streets and road wet and icey. it makes all the shop floors wet and leaves your fingers feeling as if they have been mauled by a baby cat.

and because it was only snow, nothing unusual to the country to be fair, the powers that be thought it would be a good idea to attribute the fact that the country was ‘white over’ as another reason that we’re in a credit crunch. rubbish.

“Snow may cause £1bn loss to Brit economy” i have never read so much rubbish in my life. how on earth can the poor old snow cost us 1 billion pounds? by all accounts we’re in a credit crunch, where we can’t, don’t and won’t spend money. so, where does this 1 billion pounds come from? if it hadn’t have snowed on monday this week would we have spent 1billion pounds between us in tesco and topshop? i very much doubt it.

the fact that people are attributing a bit of snow to bring extra panic and damage to the countrys economical state is almost as silly as saying you can taste beef by licking a cow.

ive felt awful all week. running nose. cough. headache. sneezing. the lot. i decided to go to the docs late at night. the emergency one. its easier. cheaper. and quicker.

i now have a heavy dose of antibiotics and a poorly chest.

i expect the design of this to change rapidly throughout the course of the next week,  i will however give you a little progressional imagery below of my choices et cetera.

recently, i have mainly been listening, and very much enjoying the marvelous sounds of elbow.

Keep me high, Keep me low
I don’t want to tell you where I’ve been

You want to fade under my speed
I’m the one who’s in your dreams
It’s the sound that you burn
I guess you didn’t learn

Keep me high, keep me low
I don’t want to tell you where I’ve been

I used to move with my shadow still
Now I’m searching for your will
That’s just the way that it goes
I guess you didn’t know
But every night that I think of you
With every voice that she brings me
It’s not pain that I’m feeling
It’s just the hate that I fear, I’m fearing

Keep me high, keep me low
I don’t want to tell you where I’ve been

common symptoms are sore throat, runny nose, nasal congestion, sneezing and coughing; sometimes accompanied by ‘pink eye’, muscle aches, fatigue, malaise, headaches, muscle weakness, and loss of appetite.

mine was obviously a lot worse, because i am a man.  therefore, i had man-flu.